Sexual Addiction.

Sexual Addiction.

I suspect every man knows what it’s like to be sexually driven from time to time.  However much sex you have, even if it’s only with yourself, it’s never enough.  Orgasm, repeatedly, fails to satiate.  But what’s the difference between been sexually driven and being addicted to sex?  And if you are sexually addicted, what can be done about it? The subject of sex addiction often raises the sniggers.  This is a shame because for...

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How To Forgive.

How To Forgive.

When I am attacked, it’s my basic instinct to try and defend myself and, if necessary, retaliate.  In our complex social worlds, we are often attacked in unseen or indirect ways.  It might be something simple like a put down by the boss.  It could be something life changing, like the murder of a loved one.  Our basic human instinct is to want to hit back.  We are angry.  We want revenge. For some of us, we get caught up in revenge.  We...

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How to Heal From an Affair.

How to Heal From an Affair.

In my previous post I highlighted that women are more concerned about the significance an affair has for the stability of the family, whereas the man is more concerned about the sexual act itself, and whether this threatens the paternity of any children she may bear.  I think for this reason alone women often expect their fellas to go to relationship counselling so they can unpick the significance of the affair and rebuild the relationship. ...

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Infidelity.

Infidelity.

A question often asked is whether we are meant to be monogamous as a species?  Perhaps this is a red herring.  The statistics show we are not very good at it.  It is estimated that 60% of men have been unfaithful and 40% of women.  This means that infidelity has occurred in as many as 80% of all relationships.  It’s almost as certain as death.  No one is immune. From a man’s perspective, it has sometimes been argued that there are...

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Tips for Interview.

Tips for Interview.

Many years ago I watched a TV documentary about how a legal team in the USA defended a man accused of murder.  As part of his preparations a witness coach was employed to give advice about presenting himself in court.  To my surprise, she advocated wearing red underwear to embolden him, and give him confidence. Not long after this, my brother asked me for advice about interview techniques.  His career had gone down a cul-de-sac for several years,...

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The Cognitive Triad in Depression.

The Cognitive Triad in Depression.

Depression is a concerning problem for any man.  Not only is depression extremely unpleasant, but the consequences can also be life threatening.  Suicide is one of the biggest killers of men, particularly young men, and depression is implicated in the vast majority of suicides and suicide attempts. What is the best way to understand depression?  One approach is to see depression as a medical problem.  On this view depression results from a reduction of the ‘happy’ neurotransmitter serotonin.  Street drugs like...

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